since ive gotten back from the philippines, i promised myself that id fix everything in my life. i admit that ive made so many mistakes in my life that i cant undo, but ive learned from each mistake that ive made. now im trying to steer my life back on track cause ive been way off it since school ended. ever since high school ended for me all i have been doing up to now, is going out a lot, going to the club, and drinking for fun. also, not even going to school, not having a real job cause ive been lazy here and there, and relying on my parents for spending money. i think that its pretty sad that over one whole year, ive amounted to nothing really. i would say i have grown but only as a person. what i mean is that emotionally, physically, and mentally i have grown but as a person that does something with their life not so much. it might not make sense at first or at all but it does to me.
but now im making a change, a change for the better for myself. im proving to everyone but mostly myself that i can do it and on my own. ive already started looking for jobs so that i could save up money [if thats even possible for me], well im going to try anyways. as for school, ive decided that i shouldnt stay here in hawaii. i need to get away from all the distractions that could possibly come my way. so i think the best way to do that is go to school in the philippines. its going to be hard, and im going to miss a lot of people but its something i feel that i must do if i want to make something of myself.
this year so far has been a real journey for me, it made me realize the hardship of life and what happens if you fail and dont get back up. if you dont get back up right away, in the long run itll take twice as long for you to recover and start over. when you fail, i believe that you shouldnt give up. you should keep trying until you succeed no matter how many times you fail. failure is just an obstacle that you must overcome in order to succeed. ive failed so many times in life but im not giving up ever, ive conquered so many obstacles to be where i am right now. but i must conquer more obstacles to reach where i want to be and im not going to stop until i get what i deserve.
im still growing as a person every single day, learning lifes lessons on my own and with the help of some of my friends as well. i still have a long way to go to reach where i want to be, although i dont know yet what i really want to be… im sure ill find out sooner or later. starting now, im getting my life back on track.